Sue Chagnon's Reflections
| Can you see the cross on my forehead? Is it still there? That's what Eleanor asked the priest who had baptized her a few hours after the service. She was 5. The priest was Rev. Kirk Kubicek "Chief" and he told us this story on Saturday night as part of his presentation at the Province I conference. He had given us a keynote address Friday afternoon and was the entertainment for Saturday night, mixing his stories with his songs. That’s how we learned about dear little Eleanor. He said that even a few weeks after her baptism she asked him after the Sunday service if the cross was still there. And every time she asked, he answered yes. And Eleanor would walk away with such a look of innocent pride and wonder. Chief left that parish and is now the rector in Ellicott City MD at St. Peter's. He recalled how years later he told Eleanor's mother that he often told this story and later had heard from Eleanor herself that being reminded of what she used to say, she thought of the question again. So have I. I was inspired by this story and the song that Chief had written about it and shared with us. I only wish now that I could remember more of that song. Can you still see the cross on my forehead? Is it still there? We had a genuine sing-along going toward the end of the evening, thanks to a projector and a screen behind Chief and Wiley Beveridge, the guest musician. They began “Jesus Loves Me” you know Jesus loves me this I know for the Bible tells me so– only Wiley’s adaptation goes beyond that we see it in Scripture and focuses on seeing Jesus’ love for us in the smile, the eyes, the touch of those around us. And at that moment I truly felt that love. I needed to hear that Jesus loves me. Probably not that I had forgotten, but that somehow my life had gotten to a point where I needed a reminder. I got one in a big way. The woman next to me reached over and gave me a hug and smiled at me, wiped a tear from my cheek. Later she called me her blessing when I thanked her for that hug. Imagine that, I am her blessing and she has shown me Jesus’ love up close. Over 300 people were in attendance at the conference called “Walking with Jesus: open eyes, eager hearts, changed lives.” I think it is very fitting that this conference is held at the beginning of spring. We have all come out of our winter shell and are ready to learn and grow, sweep off the dust and begin anew. The conference was a lot of information to take in over 2 and a half days. In the workshop given by the Vicar and some members of Calvary Church in Pascoag, RI we had a worksheet to do with 3 simple questions: Why am I Christian? Why am I Episcopalian? Why do I worship at my Church? Simple, right? Anyone who knows my story knows the answers to the 2nd and 3rd, and those were simple for me to answer. But, why am I a Christian? It seemed too simple to say because I was baptized or because my parents brought me to church as a youngster. The gentleman sitting with us put it another way: what does it mean to be a Christian? And, do we believe in that answer? What I had answered was that after 35 years I have come to understand that I am a Christian because I see and know the love of God and the presence of Jesus Christ in my life and the world around me, but until that moment, answering that question, I had never actually acknowledged it. I went to this conference thinking I would learn something I could take back to Trinity to help us on our journey together. At that moment, I began to see that this conference was a means to learn about my own spiritual journey as well. Our preacher at the Sunday worship service was the Rev. Ruth Lawson Kirk, the rector from St. Peter's in Glendale PA. She thanked Chief for sharing Eleanor's story with us and asked if we looked in the mirror could we see our cross. After all, that would be the outward sign of being a Christian: sealed with the Holy Spirit and marked as Christ’s own forever. Can you see the cross on my forehead? I’m looking for mine. In her keynote address on Saturday, Ruth posed 3 questions for the congregation, but I think they apply to each of us as well: Who am I? What are my gifts and strengths? What are the challenges I face? As you answer, ask who God is calling you to be. The Diocese of MA has as part of its mission and ministry the Cathedral Crossings bookstore. They were set up at the conference and we would browse when we had a few minutes. Dangerous for me, I am an avid reader and I LOVE to shop! And, I had my credit card. I found a book for Matthew- I’m Thankful Each Day! He has been asking us about praying and what he would say to God and I thought this would be a good way to begin. We have started reading it each night before bed. For myself I found Women’s Uncommon Prayers, full of prayers and poems for every phase and aspect of a woman’s life and faith journey written by lay and ordained women. When Kathie Denner and I got back to our room, I opened it and read the first one whose title caught my eye. “Teach us Lord” Lord, teach us to see thee not just in stained glass but in stained lives; not in Gothic arches, but in arthritic fingers. Lord, teach us to hear thee not just in hymns of praise but in sneers of disdain. Lord, let us know thee and love thee in all things as thou lovest us – For thou lovest the self-seeking as well as the unselfish; the vindictive as well as the kind, the sinners as well as the saints. Thou lovest even me, Lord. - The Reverend Virginia C. Thomas I have gone through this book often in just the last few days. I have found one I read in the morning, one at night, there is a prayer for guidance that speaks to me. Something happened to me last weekend that affected me deeply. I thought I would be going to learn something I could bring back to Trinity to help us on our journey together; I know I did that. I came home with my eyes more open to Christ, a heart eager to learn and to share. But I also found an inspiration for my own journey as a Christian walking with Jesus. Can you see the cross on my forehead? Is it still there? I think so . . . In Jesus’ Name . . . Amen -Suzanne M. Chagnon Sunday, April 17, 2005 |